Do You Hear What I Hear?

"Intentional Listening" is what I heard in my head as I awoke the other morning. It seemed to make perfect sense at the time, coming as I was from the state of dreams. Apparently, I had been dreaming about listening with intent, or I had been intending to listen. Or maybe....
Anyway, I let the phrase just sit there in the outskirts of my consciousness. I even had the thought of going through my day, intentionally listening. I wondered, do I listen WITH intent, or do I listen FOR intent? Or both?
When we are interacting with others, we can always choose to listen with intent. In fact, we do that without even thinking about it. We come to any interaction with preconceived notions about how it will go. There's nothing inherently wrong with that. It helps if we do not go into a situation with the idea that it is not going to go well, as there is a measure of self-fulfilling prophecy at play here. Say you go into a post office expecting a long line, surly clerks and an overall frustrating experience. Chances are that is what you get. You could instead go in with a book, treasure the waiting time, or strike up a pleasant conversation with the person next to you in line, then smile winningly at the clerk (OK, forget getting through to the clerk). Then your intent improves your experience!
It's the same with listening. If your intent in listening to another is to really, really hear what they have to say, not only the words, but their intent, then you have got a win-win situation. You may not like what you hear (insert example here) but if you listened with the intent of truly communicating, then you accomplished something! By the same token, if you read this post with the intent of being enlightened, you have just been fooled! Haha, Happy April Fool's Day!

May the long time sun shine upon you.....

May the long time sun
Shine upon you,
All love surround you,
And the pure light within you
Guide your way on.


Click on the title for a Video of this song.....

Spring Cleaning, Part II

Another way I am spring cleaning is clearing verbal clutter. That has two parts: the first is trying to clean up my language. Not that I have a gutter mouth, exactly, but I do let a four letter word pop out now and then! I mainly am thinking of the effect on my children with this one. I hope they don't get the idea that it's okay to use vulgar language. So far, they mostly haven't. This spring, I am working to come up with alternatives to the F and S words, especially when I am feeling aggravated. That's when they generally appear! So there may be a deeper issue there. Definitely there is, how about that.
Which leads me to the second part: negative self-talk! Negative self-talk is perhaps the single most insidious eroder of my positive energy. What I say to myself in any given moment has a powerful effect on my experience of the world. It is also an important predictor of my future experiences as well. So, I have to become more aware when I am using negative self-talk. Then stop it.

Spring Cleaning

Just an update:
I am in the midst of spring cleaning, both of my house and of my self! The house is getting de-cluttered, first of all. It is amazing how much stuff we can accumulate...we have lived here less than two years, and it already needs purging! Then there is some serious, deep cleaning to do. Enough said about that. Finally, there is a long list of home projects, some of which will be farmed out to the experts, like chimney cleaning and the like. But there are still the phone calls and arrangements to be made for those.
I am also spring cleaning my self! I'll be getting to work on shedding those winter layers; read: excess weight! Yep, it's happened again. I am a bit of a yoyo when it comes to my weight. This time, I am going to work harder at getting and staying active. Last time I really didn't incorporate an exercise regimen. This time I am.
I had my first yoga class today. It is kundalini yoga, which gives special attention to the spine and endocrine system. I have a real good feeling about this. I will also be walking more, and want to mix in some weight-bearing exercises too. I have ordered new eyeglasses, the first new pair in three years!
Finally, I am continuing the ongoing "Meredith" project - a lifelong process, to be sure. Each phase of growth is exciting. It's nice to know that we do not stop learning as we age (hopefully). I expect to be a finished product when I am ready to make my exit from this realm, and not a minute earlier.

And the winner is...

Disclaimer: these are just some thoughts I have been having on this topic. It's not meant to be my final draft.....

I have concluded that morality is relative. Morality can be absolute in some ways; the Golden Rule springs to mind. However, to take an example, one of the Ten Commandments in the Bible is "Thou shalt not kill." I suppose many of us take this on faith, that it is wrong to kill. Yet we eat dead animals that have been killed on our behalf. Yet we squish a spider or an ant or a fruit fly without a second thought. The Bible doesn't say "Thou shalt not kill, except when it's okay to kill." So, if morality were absolute, we all would live as vegans with many mosquito bites. We who do not live as vegans with many mosquito bites, who wear leather shoes and sit on wooden chairs, are not behaving immorally. We are living by the standards of our societies. Some may believe we are wrong, yet we do not believe we are wrong. I guess it comes down to whether morality is subjective or objective.
There's more to say, but I have to go to the eye doctor now!

Laughter and kindness

Is morality relative or absolute?
The reason I am asking this is that I have been wondering when, if ever, it is okay to laugh at others. I had been offered a link to a video showing clips of "crazy women drivers" crashing into things and having a hard time parking, etc. Personally, I did not find the video funny, regardless of the gender of the drivers in the clips.
Leaving aside the gender issue, the video is meant for us to laugh at others. I was left wondering why some of us find the mistakes and shortcomings of others amusing. Is it that we feel more human when we are shown examples of our foibles? Are we enjoying the feeling of superiority that we ourselves would never do these things? Or do we relate on a personal level - "Oh, I can't parallel park either - hahaha!!"
I don't want to fall into the trap of judging those who might laugh at this video - everyone comes to the table with their own experience, beliefs and values - and that colors their perception, and informs their amusement (or lack thereof!). Humor is subjective, of course. I think what struck me about the video, and the comments (overwhelmingly expressing approval), is that most people don't see anything wrong with laughing at other people. I admit, it strikes me as unkind! There, I've said it! I think there is not enough kindness in the world today. Simple, everyday kindness. And anything that perpetuates this lack of kindness must be scrutinized for its necessity. Do we need this video, and do we need to praise it?
I say no. I say what we need is more kindness. Granted, we need more laughter. But I hold that the laughter should not be at the expense of kindness.
I continue to ponder the original question, as I go about my day. I will report back later.

Happy for No Reason

The best part about being happy for no reason is that no one and nothing can take that away from you.